Sounding Effeminate & Suicidal Apparently Does Not Win Elections

"President Bush and Vice President Cheney sounded more presidential than their Democratic counterparts. Senator John F. Kerry seemed the most depressed or suicidal. And Kerry's running mate, Sen. John Edwards, sounded the most like a 'girly man'... Kerry's language also was most like that of a depressed person, followed by Edwards. Edwards also was the most likely to use feminine speech patterns and 'female' words (Bush was a close second), while Cheney sounded most like a man's man..."

-Washington Post's Richard Morin on analysis of speech patterns before the 2004 Election



Lesson for '08: It's not what you say, but how you say it. Americans don't actually listen to the words that come out of your mouth. Can you name one thing Kerry or Edwards said on the campaign trail? I really can't. If you want to win, don't make long-winded, detailed speeches in a soft-spoken manner. If you actually have something important to say, the point is lost to Americans. Plus, its depressing. The thought of listening to Kerry do a speech makes me want to aim a shotgun at my mouth and pull the trigger with my pinky-toe. And sounding like a pansy never works, especially when you are doing the Republican-lite thing. Just be a strong man (or woman) and stick to your guns, even if it means yelling at the top of your lungs. I still don't understand why Iowa didn't pick Howard Dean. He would have been better than the Ambiguously Gay Duo.